Loving Yourself While Autistic- by Becca Lory Hector

autism beccaloryhector neurodiversity neuroshifts wellbeing May 27, 2022

Self-love is essential to our well-being. How we think about ourselves and how we treat ourselves impacts both our mental and physical health. Yet, despite the amount of time we spend thinking about loving others love in our lives, it never ceases to surprise me how little time we spend treating ourselves with any kind of love.

This has to change. Why? Because loving yourself is the most important thing you can do for your well-being, even if it’s also the most challenging. We love to beat ourselves up, point out our own failings, and magnify our mistakes. We say things to ourselves that we would never say to others. We strive for perfection but would never ask that of anyone else.

That changes now. Here. Today.

Ready to tackle the how, why, what, and when of self-love? Here 5 great tips to get you started:

1. Own Your Feelings: You have to be willing own ALL of your feelings, positive and negative. Be mindful, embrace all of your feelings, and take responsibility for them. Rather than running away from them, allow them to exist and let them inform your choices.

2. Learn Your Triggers: Commit to learning about your emotional self and discovering your emotional triggers. Even the ones that you consider ugly, shameful, or "bad". Those are the ones that have the most teach us about self-love and compassion. Investigate the causes of your feelings and keep a look out for the fears and false beliefs that you may limit you.

3. Talk to Yourself, Kindly: Your internal dialogue is the key loving yourself. Talk to yourself often and kindly and you will stay in touch with your inner self. That connection is essential and will provide the answers you need to keep keeping on. The answers from our inner most selves can come immediately or over time, in words, images, or even in dreams. Keep that line of communication open.

4. Show Yourself the Love: Thinking and talking never beat doing. Loving yourself is an action, not just a feeling or a thought. A good way to find ways to show yourself the love is to ask, "What can I do to love myself?" or "How can I express my self love?" Then get going and DO IT!

5. Put it On Repeat: Loving yourself doesn't happen overnight. It's a continuous cycle that takes practice and time. It begins as work and with regular repetition becomes a habit and loving yourself is one habit you should never break.

I hope these tips start you on a journey of self-love and reminds you to show yourself some love, kindness, and compassion. You deserve to love yourself simply for being you.